He's Striving For Perfection

Jutting hips, freezing ribs,

A bony finger shakes, tracing own's tiny waist.

Pinching the skin with a thumb,

Staring dejectedly at the figures on the scale,

Erratic heartbeat, mind numb..

Gone is the laughter, gone the joy,

The first time when he deliberately heaved his guts out, 

Is the day the universe lost this boy.

Downward spiral, mind a bird's nest,

An intricate weaving of razzored scars adorn his pale chest.

Beauty eluding, the voices misguiding, 

Perfection alluring, flawlessness been finding.

One day he struck upon a treasure

It told him to not eat, and puke what he did, for good measure!

Clothes began to loosen, 

As did his ties with the world.

Derived of company,

Loses his mind in insanity's ink black swirl.

Smoke rings and vodka seem to be the answer to a riddle he's forgotten,

Not realizing his greed for perfection is wanton.

Jutting hips, freezing ribs,

A bony finger shakes, tracing own's tiny waist.

Pinching the skin with a thumb,

Staring dejectedly at the figures on the scale,

Erratic heartbeat, mind numb...

Read more about male anorexia or 'manorexia' here.

Take care, stay safe.

x

"Your mom's a dyke,isn't she?"

I was just walking down the hallway in the morning, making my way to my art class when I noticed a few people staring and pointing at me. I let it go, I was a little sleep deprived, and I thought maybe I was seeing things.

The stares got to get worse I realized. I could hear whispers, but what had I done? I didn't remember doing anything that could cause all of that! I averted my gaze and walked to my next class looking solely at the floor. I had already checked for any marks on my face or anything physically wrong, but I had come up with nothing .. I just wanted to go home. I felt insecure.. And vulnerable. So very vulnerable. As the teacher began to tell us about the evolution of language, a crumpled ball fell on my desk. I couldn't figure out who threw it at me, I opened it anyway.

"Your mom's a dyke, isn't she?" it read. 

I stared at the piece of paper, lost for words. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think .. I could hear my blood rush in my head but all I could do was stare at that sentence..

My mother had just recently come out and was currently in a relationship with this gorgeous female friend of hers.

How'd I feel about it? Really, I was happy.

That's not to say my mom and dad were horribly rude with each other or anything, but he'd left us almost a decade ago. And I could see how happy my mom was,now. Sure, it was a LOT to take in, but I was happy for my mom.  I struggled to find a way to answer this note. It hit upon me that even if I ignored this one, there'd always be others. We lived in a small town, we didn't really have a lot of drama going on. So this was bound to be the 'it' news on the grapevine for long. I, I didn't even know what I wanted to say..

The bell rang and I ran to the washroom and locked myself in a cubicle. My palms were sweaty and I felt like throwing up. 

Finally, a quarter of an hour later, I made my way out. Only to be blocked by some people I didn't expect.

They were sniggering and I knew what this was about. I mumbled an excuse trying to get past them. In vain.

"Maybe all your mom needs is a man to please her. And she'll forget this bullshit dyke shit. I've seen your mom, she looks so good, damn, I'd totally hit that" Jake said, hi-fiving his friend John.

His crass words were like knives. Is this what they thought of my mom? Is this what everyone wanted to say? I felt warm salty tears wet my cheeks before I even realized I was crying. I stood there for twenty minutes while they said worse things about their anatomy and how exactly would they convince mom to become straight. I gasped at some of the things they said, but I wanted it to get over. I wanted to go home. I just wanted to get the hell out of school and cry in my room....

"At school I would get people coming up to me and saying, your mum's gay. And I was like - it started to get to me because I realised then it wasn't normal, it was different. I sort of felt picked on and the amount of times I went to see the teachers and they said, just ignore them, they'll get bored. They never did get bored."  [Source]

Whether or not you are a supporter of the LGBTQ community, it is your responsibility as a human being to not only try and be as accepting of people as you can but also raise your children well. 

You may not believe or advocate Queer Pride, but what makes you special enough to bully or abuse someone who is? WHO ARE YOU? Just because heterosexuals are in majority doesn't make it right for you to trouble and ruin the lives of others.

Did you know that LGBTQ youth has the highest suicide rates, comparatively? This is generally always linked to homophobic attitudes and bullying. 

About 34,000 youth die every year making it the 3rd leading cause of death among LGBT individuals whose age ranges from 15 to 24. And this is still not the actual report since a lot of individuals do not come out.

According to a study in Taiwan, 1 in 5, or 20% of Taiwanese gay have attempted suicide.

Bullying isn't just physical. It could be sexual, verbal, emotional or cyber bullying. This has lead to the creation of projects such as :

• The Trevor Project
• It Gets Better

The 'It Gets Better' pledge goes as follows :
" Everyone deserves to be respected for who they are. I pledge to spread this message to my friends, family and neighbors. I'll speak up against hate and intolerance whenever I see it, at school and at work. I'll provide hope for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and other bullied teens by letting them know that it gets better."
I took the pledge.. Have you?

Some of the NGOs in India that do amazing work and function as gay/lesbian support groups can be found here, some queer support groups can be found here. 

This is a list of helplines.

The Humsafar Trust has been working for the LGBTQ community since 1994 with their various projects spanning health care, support, project management, community work, counseling, etc.

'Labians' = Lesbians and Bisexuals in Action is an autonomous and non funded, queer feminist collective of lesbian, bisexual and transgender women since 1995. They can be mailed at : streesangam@gmail.com , and their helpline 09833278171 is open on Mondays, Wednesdays and Saturdays from 5pm-8pm.

(This post was written for the iDiya contest hosted by Indiblogger)

Blog about any social cause you are passionate about, and its potential solution. If there are any inspiring people or organizations working towards solving it, blog about them as well. INR 30000 goes towards an NGO of your choosing!

Disclaimer : The post is liberal dramatization based on a quote of actual events. It is a work of fiction.

Queer Cheer || Homophobia? Now that's a choice.

I remember the first time I'd read the word 'gay'. I had come across it in the newspaper I was reading at that time and I didn't know what it was.. At eleven, I would boast of a pretty above average vocabulary and so I asked my elder cousin what it was, although I can't seem to recollect it now.

The first time I ever had a conversation/discussion about it was online on some poll or question which seems eons ago. Since when I have known what the word meant, I always thought that some people think they are attracted to their own gender and considered it normal. But when I commented that on the poll, I invited a hell lot of irk and abuse. 

"The only reason you're supporting gays is because you are one." || Apparently, I was supposed to be insulted and retract my statement. I was 13 but damnnit, I thought (think) I was right and wouldn't budge!

Now soon approaching 18, I stand by what I've always believed in, that everybody has the right to be/believe in whatever they choose. Gay/straight/atheist/Christian/Muslim/Hindu/Jain/Buddhist doesn't matter as long as you're a nice person. Because : 

I do not think as an individual, I get to choose how a certain person goes about their life. And why should I? How does it matter to me if the person is attracted to the opposite gender or his/her own?! How can I judge a person's life choices? Who or what gives me the right to brand a love wrong? Illegal? An abomination?

Who are we to call out bisexuals? To say that bisexuals are just people who are confused? That they exist because they're indecisive? 

Why can't we accept that there are people who are attracted to people of both genders? 

Anyone with questions regarding bisexuality should read this. It's informative and to the point.

Why can we so easily distinguish between an ice cream, lolly pop and a candy but not between transsexuals, drag queens and transgenders? 

Transsexualism  is generally when a person's designated gender conflicts with their psychological gender.

But basically, transgender is a generic or a common term which includes other divisions such as transsexuals, cross dressers, etc.

Millions of people across the country hide behind their daily job routines or school or college because they are afraid to come out. They're afraid to tell anyone about this HUGE aspect of their lives because that'd cause this toxic chain of events .. Parents disown their children, families refuse to recognize their existence, the bullying raises its ugly head .. 

A lot of people claim that homosexuality is learnt.
Since you're kids, your definition of a couple or marriage = a male + a female, because that is what you see around you, on the television, or you read about in books .. What if the only reason so many people are heterosexuals is because that's the only way they think life works?

Two of the biggest social institutes : home & school are what a child is influenced by the most. With everybody being exposed to media which may not be age appropriate at all times, parents should talk to their children about sex and homosexuality during their early teens or when they deem it appropriate. You want them to know the facts, but parents shouldn't influence their minds poisoning it with their prejudices and bias!

While I haven't come across any homophobic person in real life, I do know quite a few who aren't for it. One of them simply said that she doesn't get it but she isn't opposed to it. Another cites her religion for her believing that homosexuality is against law, nature and God.

God! 

Am I a believer? Yes.

Am  I religious? Yes, a little.

I personally believe that God just wants people to be happy. Whatever name you call him/her by, I believe that if you're religious or even a believer, how can you even suggest that God would hate or punish anyone who isn't straight? 

I have, since a long time, thought about this issue so much. I really would like to do something for the LGBTQ community. It is morbidly sad how apathetic we are to causes which may not directly affect us right now.

If men can be feminists, if men can fight for women rights, why can't straight people fight for queer rights?

This is the time to do things. Stop hatred around you.

• Calling a party gay because it's lame? STOP.
• Calling someone gay because he cries? STOP.
• Calling someone gay because he doesn't revel or show off his macho-ness? STOP.
• Calling someone a lesbian because she's touchy-feely around her friend? STOP

Bullying kills people. There are innumerable people who have suffered from hate and bullying because they are a part of the LGBTQ community. There are teens who have been murdered .. Is this the kind of rigid society you want to live in and pass on?

Calling anything lame 'gay' has become an excruciatingly annoying habit now a days, if you do it too, stop. Ask your friends to stop. While you can't force everyone, or expect everyone to be pro LGBTQ, the least anyone can do as a human being is stop with the gay/faggot/fag/queer insults. 

If you notice someone doing this, try and stop it. Be a nice person for a change.

There is no cut method to remove homophobia and increase awareness instantaneously. It is a long process we need to work on constantly. But we need to start today. Start small, read up. Understand what the community is about, understand what they feel when people react the way they usually do. Put yourself in their shoes. Be more accepting. 

Be open minded. Pass it on to your siblings, your friends, your readers and your parents. Queer Pride is a thing to be celebrated. Today. Now.

*****

Some of the NGOs in India that do amazing work and function as gay/lesbian support groups can be found here, some queer support groups can be found here. 

This is a list of helplines.

The Humsafar Trust has been working for the LGBTQ community since 1994 with their various projects spanning health care, support, project management, community work, counseling, etc.

'Labians' = Lesbians and Bisexuals in Action is an autonomous and non funded, queer feminist collective of lesbian, bisexual and transgender women since 1995. They can be mailed at : streesangam@gmail.com , and their helpline 09833278171 is open on Mondays, Wednesdays and Saturdays from 5pm-8pm.

"Homosexuality : (n) Sexual desire or behavior directed toward a person or persons of one's own sex.

Homophobia : (n) Unreasoning fear and antipathy towards homosexuals and homosexuality."

(This post was written for the iDiya contest hosted by Indiblogger)

Blog about any social cause you are passionate about, and its potential solution. If there are any inspiring people or organizations working towards solving it, blog about them as well. INR 30000 goes towards an NGO of your choosing!

"Long live the walls we crashed through, I had the time of my life with you"

Longer relationships do not necessarily mean better because in you two, I find everything I need.

You get me. You get my obsession with sun screen and how I hate realizing I don't have my hand sanitizer in my bag. You know it takes me an hour to finish my ice cream cone. You know that my phone is switched off , or on airplane mode half the time and that's why your call won't get through. You get my love for Taylor and her music. You get my envy for amazing headsets and how I drool over those gorgeous headphones. You get how I like and want my wardrobe to be clean. You also get how my wardrobe would be purple and black black black if I had my way (I hope you read this ma). You get me when I'm typing with correct grammar and punctuation but also when I'm all "omg nOOO! SO BEAUTIFUL I CANNOT OMG JUST CNAT hELP". 

~ Saturn ~

She's the reason why fanfictions are my life now-a-days. She makes me pasta and concocts evil steal-her-phone plans with my younger brother. She thinks she's awkward at deep talks but she doesn't realize (because she's an idiot) how many times she has made me go from what-is-life to smiling and giggling at my phone because of her SURV and just Saturn being the adorable alien that she is! She was my date to the #TwitterYuleBall2012 although she ditched me early and I left a little while later and we missed Chris Rankin, but oh well! She's the one who actually took about a hundred screenshots for me when my phone couldn't, because she just is that nice. She unlocks her phone with her nose sometimes. She's a Slytherin and her creepily awesome evil side comes out sometimes and it is hilarious! She is that friend who steals the cheese off of your toast because she loves cheese. Also that person who makes cold coffee despite having a cold because hey, who cares about colds during exams which might totally make you ill and unable to study which is hard anyway. She has beautiful long hair and also I have this photo of her in yellow which might be one of the cutest photos I've seen of people I know in real life. I've never told anybody 'I love you' in less than two years of knowing them as much as I have told her because I do, I do. She also owes me chocolates, loads of 'em, so yaaay for that! :D

~ Vy ~ 

She knows how awkward and socially handicapped I am around new people thanks to have known me right at the beginning of 11th grade. She has these beautiful brown eyes which look like molten chocolate when light hits them, which is accurate & appropriate since she's very warm and exceptionally trusting. If I had to assign her to a house, she'd probably be a Gryffinclaw. Or a Ravenpuff?  She's the mature one of the group, although I realize that doesn't say a lot! She's technically challenged too, so I don't feel alone and everything. She's the person I bunked my first lecture with, and we went to Marine Drive and just sat there talking. She has epiphanies in showers and also pointlessly has this delusional idea wish that someday I will tell her who my favorite from One Direction is! don't hold your breath coz it's not going to happen. She knows how it feels when your younger siblings just borrow steal stuff from you and her parents say things which are eerily similar to what mine do. She Googled 'Blahblaholic' one day and read a lot of my posts at one go, so FOUR FOR YOU VY! YOU GO VY! I know she's the kind of person who would always give nice advice on being asked even if what you'd done was something terribly mean, because she just is that kind of a gem. She didn't know what MOFOs mean, isn't that precious? :P Hey Vy, I saw a demon child on my way back xD

Saturn and I are going to live together and adopt kids while Vy will live next to us with her charming, sweet, adorable partner and whenever our kid will poop/cry/annoy us we shall call her and she'll take care of everything. But Saturn might also meet some awesome person near some *cough* areas surrounding this city which starts with an N, so I'm not too sure about the idea? But for now, this plan is on like donkey kong.

We are going to have a hispter sleepover filled with One Direction+Supernatural fangirling, ice cream, cheesy movies and the dress code strictly is hair buns, and loose crappy home clothes. We are so fabulous, aren't we? Then we'll ride the trains from the first station to the last and back. And go to a karaoke bar. 

I was just missing these two crackpots so I decided to write this mush vomit. I'll be writing much more frequently now that I have holidays.
See you guys soon.

X

SURV = sunshine, unicorns, rainbows & Voldemort.

Four for you Glen Coco! You go Glen Coco! = Mean Girls quote.

Title = 'Long Live' by Taylor Swift.

Product Review #01 : L'Oréal Paris Le Nail Art Stickers : Chic, easy, nail art now falls right in your laps!

"Salon quality Nail Art has never been so easy!"

As someone who cannot even paint her nails perfectly (due to lack of practice I'm sure) , nail art stickers seem like just the solution to my problems! I was extremely excited to give these a try!

You file your nails, you apply these and voila! You're done! Now doesn't that sound great?

• Product : Le Nail Art
• Company : L'Oreal Paris
• Price : Rs 299/- for 18 stickers.

"The 1st nail art stickers in both 2D and 3D effects by L'Oreal Paris. Give nail art a try with this collection of patches that adds fun patterns and shine to fingertips and toes. Each nail applies ultra easily and provides long wear-with zero drying time, or smudging. 3 step application, instant couture result."

The 8 nail art stickers

~ Pricing ~

This pack costs Rs 299 for 18 stickers. I find it to be quite reasonable since a manicured nail art would cost the same, if not more. If you divide it, you may find Rs17/nail to be sort of expensive, but all in all, I think it's a pretty good deal!

~ Directions ~

The directions printed on the back of the cover are very straight forward, and easy to follow. A lot of times we find that instructions are printed, but either you don't know how or they sound very advanced.

This comes with very basic and easily doable 3 steps which include applying the sticker, folding it & filing the excess sticker.

~ Application ~

The rules printed along the cover pretty much cover it up. You position the round end at the base of your nails, fold it over your nail tip and just file the excess away! All you need is 10 minutes and a filer. Instant beautification :D

~ My review ~

These nail art stickers are literally a boon for clumsy, lazy folk like me. They are extremely easy to use. The stickers come in about 3 varied sizes as well so we can use the broader ones for our toes/thumbs and the narrow ones for the pinky fingers, which is pretty clever thinking, me thinks. :D

Notice the sizes!

The stickers do not have any pungent smells, nor are they sticky. So you really CAN apply them in a jiffy, with no mess created at all! Only immaculately pretty looking nails.
And the best part is that they're terribly convenient to put on, and remove as well! So for all you adventurous spirits who change nail polish/nail art often, this is convenient and practically gets done in 10!

009 - Poudre D'Or

~ Durability ~

The cover says that these stickers last for 10 days. I shall post an update regarding this, but hey oh, if you garden or take beauty baths with your nails submerged in water for LOOONG (which is unhealthy for your hands,nails btw) then this statement is null & void! (I love saying null & void. They're such cute words, aren't they!)

Should you buy a pack? Definitely!

~ Reasons to use these stickers ~ 

• Zero Dry Time is such a blessing! The days of blowing at your fingers and avoiding touching any materials are passe thanks to these nail stickers!
• No Nail Color Remove Required to change your style, just peel off and it's done!
• Zero Nail Damage as these nails have been tested for safety and will not damage your precious nails!
• Zero Application Mistakes since all you need to do is position them & paste!
• Extremely Easy Application since the hardest part is something we've done as primary school kids. It would take hard work to screw this up!
• Reasonably Priced and you know the end product is worth it! 

~ Tips ~

• These stickers look their best with long, well maintained nails. So if you're planning on putting them on during a weekend, keep those claws sharpened and clean during the week!
• While applying the stickers, if you first fold the nail sticker over your nail tip like we fold perforated papers before tearing and then you file the excess off, it becomes rather easy.

Blurry on purpose. Looks like a cluster of stars, doesn't it?

~Suggestions~

I couldn't find anything I'd like to improve on this product, except that it'd be brilliant if they could probably add a board filer to the pack since that makes it extremely convenient, but hey, that's just a lazy girl talking! ;)

You can find out more at the L'Oreal Paris India Facebook page.

[Disclaimer : THIS REVIEW IS BASED ON PERSONAL EXPERIENCE.]