Barren

She thought of all the lullabies she would never sing, 

as she idly kicked the empty swing.

She reminisced about the aeroplane noises she'd never make,

and all the precautions she would never be told to take. 

She felt a shuddering cold,

As she thought of the parental role into which she'd never mould.

Discarded onesies lie wasted in the room,

Damp with tears, enveloped in gloom.

She sobbed as she thought of all the stories she would never tell,

Just because she let her guard down once, and down she fell.

They were watching her like a hawk, judging her.

(Finally I wrote a fictional post again. YAYY :D | Do read & lemme know how you found it!)

*********

She did things. She thought it was finally to put the past behind her, to move on.

Meera woke up early next morning, she wanted a proper new started, even if that meant going to bed early and waking up in dire need of coffee to find enough strength to brush her teeth!

She switched her phone on and went to freshen up. She returned to find 2 text messages. On was the standard spam message about winning a UK lottery. She shook her head and continued to the 2nd one.

It read :
" Hey there M! Good morning gorgeous. I wish you all the very best on this whole new start. And if you need someone to remind you that it is a brilliant plan when you start to lose faith, you have me. Have a great day! X"

This brought a radiant smile to her face! She knew she could count on him.. And this just went on to prove her right!

She replied with a thanks and went on with her day with boosted confidence.

(9 pm)

Meera had had a long day. But she felt good, she was still humming to herself. She decided to go online for a while to kind of take a break. She deserved it, she said to herself.

As she scrolled through the statuses and photos smiling every now and then, a chat box popped up.

• "How are you doing Meera?! It's been so long! What's up girl?"
• Hi .. I'm doing pretty good, thanks :) How are you?
• "What's going on in life? UPDATE ME! :D"
• Haha, not all that exciting Ria. Just a new job. It's going pretty good, today was my first day. The office looks wonderful Ria, you'd love it!
• "That sounds nice! I'm happy for you!"
• Aww. Thank you! What's new with you?
• "Ah, nothing. Same old, same old. Achha listen, what's with the new boyfriend haan?"
• I'm sorry, what? Come again? WHAT BOYFRIEND?!!
• "You're talking to me babe, drop the act. Heard you're all lovey dovey with Ranjith-whats-his-name .. ?!
• I thought you knew better than that Ria. Guess not! What the hell? We're just close friends. What is wrong with you people?
• "Whoa , slow down there. You broke Mayank's heart 6 months ago. Now you're talking a lot with this guy, at least that's what the rumors state. Of course people are going to assume y'all are together. DUH."
• Even if I am dating him, IF, how is it anyone's bloody business? And guess what, I didn't "break his heart" just for my own entertainment. It wasn't workin... never mind, why should I keep explaining myself to everyone! You know what? Think whatever you want. I don't give a shit. And you can tell your 'rumor mills' to get a life and STOP. SPECULATING. ABOUT. MINE!

She didn't tell anyone but after that day, she felt her world crashing down on her. No longer was she happy about the beautiful day. She thought about what she could do to stop all this as tears streamed down her face.

Why, when she was trying her hardest to move on, were they stuffing it in her face? Why wouldn't they leave her alone? When would they ever stop judging her?

Just because she ended one relationship, did that mean they would continue to look at her this way all the time? 

She sighed. The clock struck twelve. She was going to have a long day tomorrow as well. She sniffed, wiped her face and eased herself onto the bed.

*********

What'd you think about that? :] 

Her Never Ending Nightmare.

I sit here, pushing down spoonfuls of ice cream down my throat. Tears stream down my face, I never knew we would fall apart. I thought it was some temporary thing.. Your parents, tension, this inflation and everything.

We used to be so amazing, I remember when J&S would always keep asking us how we'd never let it get ugly. Only if they could see us now.

Feels like it was just yesterday, when we were screaming in your living room. You saw me crying, but you kept on fighting. We fought and cried, and shouted some more. Finally, I left.

By now, just about everybody would have gotten to know.. About us.. Oh wait, there is no us anymore.

Feels like a never-ending nightmare.

"Is it over yet? Can I open my eyes? Coz this is hard as it gets, Is this what it feels like to really cry? Cryyy.." (Kelly Clarkson)